This is part helpful suggestion, part career advice, part scold.

I’m making my holiday cookies. This year, I wanted to make lemon cookies. On our Italy trip we visited a lemon/olive oil farm and since then, I’ve craved all things lemon. There really are no better lemons than those from the Amalfi Coast.

So I Google up a lemon cookie recipe. This is what the Food Network cookies SHOULD look like:

We’ll save the crime scene photo for last.

Here’s the problem:

The recipe lists the ingredients, good. I gather them together, zesting and juicing a lemon, measuring out flour and sugar, softening the butter. The first step is to “preheat oven to 350 degrees”. Done. I mix the ingredients, then come to this:

Chill in refrigerator for a minimum of TWO HOURS.

THEN WHY DID YOU TELL ME TO PREHEAT THE OVEN???

Being a careful follower of recipe rules because we all know what happens when you don’t follow the recipe; chaos or food poisoning ensues, I let the dough chill for almost three hours; cool, I had other things to do.

“Slice rolled dough into 1/2″ rounds”- but no, there’s no ‘slicing’ because the dough, chilled for more than the minimum two hours, squishes into lumpy ovals. So, I rolled the dough into balls then flatten so they look like close approximation of slices.

The result:

They melted into a thin mess which stuck to the non-stick bakeware and have little lemon taste. (I’m throwing the whole mess out, but I needed evidence.)

What’s needed here are TWO things: 1) logical progression of instructions. You don’t tell someone to heat the oven and then wait two hours (or more) for the dough to chill. 2) Someone who doesn’t know the recipe by heart to proofread, then test the clarity and conciseness of those instructions.

Clearly that didn’t occur.

I’ve found that this sort of thing happens in recipes; the chef/creator doesn’t put the instructions in a logical order and well, that’s maddening. And it shouldn’t be. Even chefs need to learn how to write well. Here are my notes:

I should not have to make notes that a LARGE lemon is required (mine was average sized) for a good lemon taste. I should not have to highlight that refrigeration for longer than what they post as the minimum PRIOR to baking is vital so I see it before turning on the oven. I should not have to ignore the “slice into rounds” instructions and use my own “roll into balls then flatten” because the dough won’t slice. I’m not an expert baker, but I can follow a recipe-IF the chef/creator gives clear, logical instructions. And proofreads them.

I’m headed back to the kitchen to make my white chocolate chip-walnut Toll House cookies. I know that recipe works. Into the trash with the lemon cookies, I’ve lost my zest for them. Do better, Food Network.